| Location | Scotch Plains, New Jersey |
| Salary | $22–$30 Per Hour |
SCOTCH PLAINS, NJ: THE CRAYONS HAVE FORMED A GOVERNMENT AND IT IS GOING POORLY.
Breaking updates from inside the situation:
️ The crayons now have a cabinet. Blue is Secretary of Snacks. Nobody trusts Burnt Sienna. A rubber duck has applied for asylum. A sentient cupcake is demanding a recount. A chicken has been seen wearing a tiny tie. We have not asked questions.
The crayons have issued one final decree, and we quote: “BRING US A BEHAVIOR TECHNICIAN OR BRING US NOTHING.”
That someone is YOU. The vote was unanimous (the chicken abstained).
THE MONEY PART (PLEASE LIE DOWN ON THE FLOOR)
• Your wallet has left the building. • Your bank account is doing cartwheels. • Your landlord just sent you a fruit basket. • Your couch: “Are we still friends?” ️
TOP-SECRET MISSION BRIEFING:
Location: Scotch Plains, NJ (the crayons insist it’s “the capital”) Position: Behavior Technician / ABA Para Hours: After-school sessions Mission: 1-on-1 with an awesome kid, aka the best part of your day Known side effects: Making a REAL difference
️ OFFICIAL HAZMAT-LEVEL WARNING ️
Doctors are baffled. This job may cause: Smiling so hard your face files a complaint Spontaneous happy dances in public places️ Screaming “AMAZING JOB!!!” at a block tower (it earned it) Taking board games so seriously a referee may be required Roaring at nothing. Just roaring. Totally normal. Sudden, lifelong loyalty to bubbles
Side effects are permanent. No refunds. The chicken has your information.
WHY YOU’LL LOVE IT (THE CRAYONS HAVE PREPARED A PRESENTATION)
Zero cubicles. Zero spreadsheets. Zero sad desk lunches. Zero “per my last email.” Help a child learn, grow, and build awesome new skills Do something that genuinely matters Celebrate every tiny win like breaking news (interrupt the broadcast! a kid stacked three blocks!)
ARE YOU OUR PERSON? TAKE THE QUIZ.
Love kids? INCREDIBLE. Patient, dependable, and willing to learn? THE CRAYONS ARE WEEPING. Have ABA experience or an RBT certification? BONUS POINTS. CONFETTI CANNON. FIREWORKS. A SMALL PARADE. Can make a ridiculous noise on command? Go ahead. We’ll wait. You’re hired.
WE’RE FILLING THIS SPOT ASAP!
(Not panic mode. Not chaos mode. Not “the chicken is in charge” mode. Just enthusiastic mode.)
DON’T JUST SCROLL PAST YOUR NEXT FAVORITE JOB.The crayons are watching. ️️ So is the chicken.
MESSAGE ME TODAY and let’s see if you’re the missing piece of our puzzle!
SCOTCH PLAINS, LET’S FIND OUR PERSON!
P.S. If you read this whole thing, you’ve already passed the first interview. The chicken would like to schedule your second one.