When Are You at Your Worst at Work?

In the workplace, you've probably never considered yourself a "difficult co-worker." After all, you don't slack on your work load. You don't gossip about colleagues. And at least once a month you splurge and buy doughnuts for everyone in the office. How could anyone not like you?

But lately you've noticed you're getting dirty looks after meetings. Nobody's invited you to go out to lunch in more than a month. And when you ask for a little help on a project, suddenly everyone's "too busy" to help. 

If this sounds familiar, it might be because you've been alienating your co-workers. It's not that you're an unlikable person or a bad employee. It's just that your behavior during one or two situations, such as an office retreat or training session, has tainted your reputation.

Fortunately, you're not the only one who mishandles work situations, according to Robert Orndorff and Dulin Clark, co-authors of "The PITA Principle: How to Work with and Avoid Becoming a Pain in the Ass."

"We have yet to meet the perfect professional. Let's face it: All of us have problematic areas where we annoy our co-workers now and again. And on any given occasion, with the right set of circumstances, anyone can be the dreaded co-worker," they say.  

Here are five such occasions that tend to bring out the worst in employees and problematic behavior to avoid.

Meetings

Don't become easily distracted. Think back to the last meeting you attended. Were you glued to your BlackBerry? How many times did your cell phone serenade co-workers with a "Welcome to the Jungle" ring tone? Rather than offending colleagues with a seemingly apathetic attitude, try looking them in the eye and asking questions throughout the meeting. And yes, leave your cell phone and BlackBerry at your desk.

Don't come unprepared. A sure-fire way to frustrate co-workers is to skip doing the preliminary work or research required to move a meeting forward. People have plenty of excuses for not getting their work done, but very few of them are worth forgiving. Try checking with co-workers before a meeting to make sure you've done the work and have the materials needed to be prepared.

Performance reviews

Don't become overly defensive. The point of the review is not to scold or belittle you for errors you've made throughout the year. It's to offer constructive guidance on how you can improve your performance and make yourself an asset to the employer. Rather than defending yourself and becoming agitated, try listening more than talking and expressing a willingness to improve.

Don't demand too much, too soon. Upon a good review, many employees mistakenly believe they're entitled to a raise or promotion. You may feel like you've earned these rewards, but for one reason or another your employer isn't ready to offer them to you. Rather than hounding your supervisor or whining about how you're being treated unfairly, ask him or her what steps you still need to take to advance at work.

Group projects

Don't adopt a "my-way or no-way" attitude. Whether it happened as a student or an employee, we can all remember a group project gone awry. Too often, this occurs because someone in the group is a know-it-all and refuses to acknowledge their teammates' suggestions. To avoid being this type of colleague, try waiting to hear team members' ideas before offering your own. And don't forget to compliment the suggestions of others.

Don't whine about others. Just as there will always be people who go above and beyond their responsibilities, others will try to get by doing the least amount of work as possible. It's easy to be annoyed with these types of people, but pointing out their shortcomings does little to compensate for the work that still needs done. Rather than pointing the finger of blame, focus on being grateful to those who do put in the additional effort. 

Happy hour get-togethers

Don't get too wasted. We've all heard the horror stories about the co-worker who got too drunk at a holiday party and started bashing his/her boss and co-workers, spilling secrets no one was meant to hear or behaving in any other rude and inappropriate manner in front of colleagues. Remember that just because things are said and done outside of the office, doesn't mean the consequences won't carry over into the workday.

Don't sulk in a corner. OK, so maybe hanging out with co-workers after hours isn't your idea of a great time. Perhaps you've got a handful of errands you need to run or maybe you just don't like the people you work with. In times like these, it's best to just grin and fake it, rather than showing your colleagues how irritated you are to be spending time with them.

Downsizing, mergers and restructuring

Don't be the gloom and goom guy. Nothing is more stressful than wondering whether or not your job is on the chopping block. Many people who face such situations become obsessed with analyzing every thing that's said or done in the workplace, trying to decide what it means to their job security. Not only does this start to interfere with your work performance, it will go a long way into bringing down the mood of those around you.

Don't take your good fortune for granted. When job cuts rolled around, you were one of the lucky ones. Unfortunately, some of your co-workers were laid off. If you're jumping for joy while others have lost their jobs, it won't take long for people to think you're tacky, rude and self-absorbed.

Selena Dehne is a career writer for JIST Publishing who shares the latest occupational, career and job search information available with job seekers and career changers. Her articles help people find meaningful work, develop their career and life plans, and carry out effective job search campaigns.